it's MY life, mofos.

I Decide Lyrics.
Don't think that you can tell me what to think
I'm the one who knows what's good for me
And I'm stating my independence
Gonna take the road I'm gonna take
And I'm gonna make my own mistakes
It's my life.

I decide
I decide how I live
I decide who I love
The choice is mine.
And no one gets to make my mind up.
I decide
I decide where I go
What I need, who I know
I'm the one who's running my life.
I decide
I decide

ave been living life real messed up with the term " friendship. " recently and it's difficult to fuckin' please everyone and so im finally gonna be heeding the advice of changin myself for the ones i treasure only. i realized don't make good friends. they are really petty. and i have bin called obnoxious by my fellow ex friend whom im dumping for life vice versa. i havent talked about this cos it seemed pointless to mention something about me that you 2 cant stand but lemme point this out. you dont have to reply it back to me in your blogs shietsoever. since you guys are so petty, and whereas im always havin sucha big heart, then i guess it's best we seper8 ways. i pretty am damn sure it's your choice too aint ? funny you 2 are, really. i mean, it's my person to alwyas be l8. and just becos of that tiny shot we end our friendship ? holy, what kinda " friendship. " is that ? what is friendship to you ? like, take this for instance. you always pick at my favo food and simply becos of that, i call it an end to our friendship that is made up of so many other things. dont you see it's so damn " fake." ? i dont kno any other words to describe but hey. simply becos you always pick @ my food, i end everything. what do i give you an impression of our friendship ? just based on the food ? dont i resemble someone who dont treausre our frienship that is built up all along the years ?im not doing any comparisons here but what about KK ? ive been l8 for over an hour everytime i meet her but she doesn't just fuck me off ? she doesn't go " fuck you bitch. you're always late for everything. you're wasting a friggin quatre of my life waiting for you. i think we shuld go seperate ways since you're never early. "
it's bloody damn . . . . . . . . . . . ..... . . . ( i dont ever use this but here it is for this case. ) y'kno ?

farah too. she's spent her precious time waiting for me for more than how many hours ? she doesn't just fuck me off either ? she doesn't go " fuck you bitch. you're always late. dont think im born to wait for you, you stinky shit. fuck off. we shall end our friendship since u r A-L-W-A-Y-S wasting my time. " ?

and so what about so many other people that waited for me ? my mom ? my brothers ? my teachers ? huh ?

so please. if you wanna call it an end, realize the reason why you're doing before deciding and announcin them to me cos it doesnt make me feel sad but really odd that you are so petty. ending what we hav for a single thing. i won't ever break with you even if i SPEND not WASTE 8 hours of my day waiting for you cos everythime i meet ? i dont go counting the times i SPENT not WASTED on you but how much fun we had and the memories we left. but we 3 are so different. i dont judge on punctuality but u 2 do. it's just like we're hanging out wit the wrong crowds. but it's been long and let's just forget about it. this is gonna go no where but that's for having you 2 as friends for quite sum time. becos just 6 days ago, i lost 2 of the people i used to treasure and i have no intention of gettin them back. and you will never understand the pain and anger you 2 left me with when you 2 walked away. just like how it goes, memories will fade one day, but the hurt you left will always be permanant. do not call me when you 2 need help cos i wont be there. instead, i will drag you 2's precious time so. have fun.

and this thing i will n-e-v-e-r forget. you dont and will never kno how it feels when i looked out to you all the while when i was in the bus on the way home but of all the seconds i looked, you fuckin only looked at your friend. and as the bus drove away, i still looked at you to say good bye but you only waved goodbye to her. and culd you believe i still looked at you thinkin you'd turn back at me to wave goodbye ? ha, i must have been the biggest fool. but did i give you any shit ? i fucking believe i don't. and do i end our friendship simply becos of that ? oh yes i did i did ???? ha. please. when i treasure somethin, i dont take into consideration one tiny shit and allow that to affect our relationships.

i thot the day would end so happily and i was so over the planets when i knew we could all make it and finally have the funny miss swan moments we used to have but it had to end tragically in tears. i dont wish to mention this case anymore but 1 thing's fo sho. you 2 enjoy your life. wthout me. good bye to the people whom i treasured.
-
i've been pretty damn stressed up these few days. friends who dont understand really suck. sometime ive been so angry and hurt to the extent of just banging my head on the wall and end all my friendships i have with everybody ( no joke. ) it is really damn annoying. a tells me ever since K came in here, i have neglected her and him and it and shit to be with K. 2 tells me i have done this fuck shit whatever !!!!!!! oh fuck it. if you're not happy then simply fuck off !!! damn. this shit is killing me lemme tell you this. KK is someone i have treasured and been friends with since i was in myanmar when we both were 2 little girls. so if you think i am gonna neglect her for any of your wasted trips, then you are proved wrong. doesn't this sound like you and your friends of 5 years are great friends and when i come into the light, you're gonna spend more time with me simply becos we're new friends ?? no, no. thats not how it works. i am someone who dont live to pleasure people that come into my life fresh. i treasue my old friends. KK understands my time limits. she forces me to go home so i wuldnt be punished. becos she's understanding, i dont wish to say about you.

have a great life 2 peepos. you 2 will rock the world. go get some fun with friends who dont waste your time. peasout.

Mom.

i love my mom more than anythin' else in the world.

she'll always be there to occupy the space within my heart.
when she's happy, i am willing to wash the toilet without being asked.
when she's busy, i want all the time in the world to stop and tickle slowly by to give her time.
when she's party-ing, i want her to meet new men, new men that worth her.
when she's not there, i long for her presence so much.
when i see her frown, i long to cheer her up by telling her the good things i did.
when i see her donate money to the poor, i feel the rush of pride that i have sucha mom.
when i see her in that dress, i think to myself. damn. when will i ever look like her ?

when i see her sleep, i feel she's the best mom in the world.

when i think of all the work she's done, i wanna break down and cry.
when i think of her, all i can think of is her love.
when i look at her, all i can see is how much of a capable woman she is.
when i see her, i see the mom i aspire to be.
when she smiles, i feel all the troubles are just a spec of dust.
when she's by my side, i want nothin more than to tell her i love her.

ZANGRY !

DIS HAS GOTSA B THE WORST LUCK I HAV EVER GOTTEN MYSELF IN TO IN AGES ! imagine. ( let ur imagination flow ! )

you march gaily outta the skool, havin juz had your oral examination which ure darn positif of. the weather is just like yor mood, light and breezy. boom boom blast yor happy gay song in your ears, on and on you march, thinkin' of every little things that put a smile on your face when all of a fuckin' sudden, you feel somethin' gluey hit yor head. somthin' gluey drop you. so you stop dead on the track and pause.
cos that waz what xactly happend to me !!!!!

that little fucka !
lemme share wit you wot happend.

so then, i dared my fingers to travel up to my ear to feel the shit that juz landed on me and indeed, it truly did feel gluey and slimy. i didn't kno wot it waz so i looked up but there werent ani birdz wotsoever. so i walked on a little, but then somethin in me juz prompted me to turn back. so i did, just for safety measures, and i saw a pair of legs hurry to the back. ( i was at the path which leads to WM. the tiny weeny one. ) and then, i felt i knew wot was that fucken shit that dropped on me earlier on.


am in caps now cos i was fuggin pissed + annoyed + angry + pissed + annoyed + angry + pissed = shouted.

" EW ! SON OF A BITCH !! "

i waznt directin my words at that fucka but the fact that i think i knew wot he juz did. but i think he heard me anyhow cos his pairs of legs walked back to the " balcony. " of the car park and his mouth were twistin and movin in the shape of god knows what but i culdnt hear him any way cos my happy gay song was still blaztin lik mad in my ears. i felt fkdamn pissed at that mofo i wanted to sco him but i culdnt even hear what waz goin on on the outside. so i raized my fingers up to the slimy fuck again and got even more angry. i then took off the ear-piece that was stuck in my right ear ( my right side of the head is the poor little victim. ) and then i heard that little fuka's voice.

" sorry sorry ! "
" EW ! - i kept frowin crazily and showed tantrum and my displeasure. - "
" you got tissue of not ah ??? "
" OF COS NOT YOU LAH FUCKER ! "

with that i walked off, my inside were hort enuf to evapor8 the mildly wet ground. i was so boilin mad like an erupting volcano and sure ! luck was so on my side cos of allllllllllll days, my tissue had to run out today. i was greeted with the plastic cover of the tissue. i still felt damn pissed inside so i turned back, and that little fucka still had the fuggin cheeks to look back at me !!!!! mofo !!!! i waz so angry i stared at him and threw my plastic in his direction but of cus, my poor plastic got carried away by the wind. and my my, guezz the next thing that happened !!!!!?



THE RAIN DROPS STARTED POURIN' DOWN ON ME !!!!! i didn't bugde the least, i was just starin @ the carpark that mofo was in, thinkin if i suld go in and look for that fucka but 1.5\3 of me stopped me cos who knos when that fucka wuld rape me. ahem im sayin rape not to compliment myself ahem ahem, but becos if he rapes me, theres nuffin' i can do. but if fights with me, hey ! i am a karatoe pro you kno ! not that i got learn lah. but you know. just a few kicks here a few punches there a few slaps everywhere and he will sure fall right down. but if he rapes me !!!!? see. sometimes in life we have to make the right €hoicez. HA ! HA ! HA ! oh boy, i am turnin' into a full time pope m i not ???



but anywayz !!!! lemme switch back to my angry interior again. i was soakin wet when i got unda the shelta.

" hi aunty. do u sell tissue papers here ???? "
" whoa ! you're wet from head to toe !!! here here, use this to dry yourself. "

if my hearin problem proves to be perfart, then im pretty damn sure she told me not to pay cos i left the shop wivout payin. plus, i still had my left ear piece on !_!
but anyway, i just used the whole tissue pack on my right ear cos i felt like a spitting pit. mofo. SOAB. who does he think he is !!!!!? guys who don't aim where they shoot are truly gettin not on but IN my nerves ! who the fug wuld wanto spend a few minits of their life living with the little fuckas' phlegms !!!!? no one i dare say ! wha lau eh, im still boilin mad when i think if that mofo.



as tho bad luck didn't have their play, i ALMOST got scalded AND scarred today !!!!! when i got back home, i waz still feelin pissy so i went to fry myself some pratas. the oil i usually see was no where to be found today so i saw this really ancient lookin oil which was like damn dusty and dirty trapped in the cupboard but i didn't care anyhow. as it got heated up, it started givin' off this really fish-y smell. i was a bloody idiot i lifted the pan, blew cool ( like it wuld. ) and smelt the fryin pan and it did, indeed smell like a fish. so i got to the dust bin, the hostel's dustbins are like kismis's green's dustbin outside the house. thos super long green ones ? aaah, those in our skool canteen onez. so like i was sayin, even tho i knew wot i waz doin, i waznt concentr8in' cos i was still thinkin' of the fucka's phlegm that HAD to land on MY ear. so i stepped on the paddle but i waz so dreamy i forgot i held my fryin pan right on top of the coverin lid so baaaang ! the force sent my frying pan flying. i wazo shocked i quickly releazed the paddle, and as i was doin that, i also put down my sky high hands + the FP, baaang once more, i forgot when u lift your leg OFF the paddle, the lid comes crashin down so ka-bang ! the bloody lid came crashin on my frying pan so in the end, my FP got sandwiched in between the lid and the body of the DB itself. not to forget my hands were stil holding on to the FP. it waz so shocking. and im still damn sirprized why not one drip of the boiling hot oile spilled !!!! the first thing that came into my mind when the FP first went flying was " oh shit !!! my face !!! " but my dumb left hand didn't function and my eyes were just stuck on the FP, to see when the oil were gonna splash out. and when it got knocked down buy the lid, i thot and did the same thing i did the first time but stil, no oil slashed. ha ha, count me lucky.

i also forgot, i had to help my cluster IC carry her snacks home okay ! i saw her in the bus and she was carryin bags of snacks for the birthday celebration TMR so bein the nice girl i alwayz hav been, i told her i'd lend a hand.

well anyway ! i met KK yesterday over at WM. ha ha ! it waz my happy day. so i was happy t-h-r-u-o-u-t, even when i got to WM. went up to order my daily dish, in case you ever think of treatng me, are the Gor - Tie, Red Ruby without caramel for desert and set 24 with eggs ! xcept i fidnt get #2r this time round cos i waz stuffed of happiness :oD so i went tp the cashier, and little conversation took place.

" ha ha hello miss ! you like to eat gor -tie alot ah ! "
" ha ha, hello,ya ^^ "
" girl you in sec 1 ah ?? "
" no lah, im in sec 3. "
" where are you from ? how old r uy ? "
" im from myanmar, already 17. "
" oh, you just got here ? "
" no lah, ha ha, im here for almost 8 years already "
" waaa so long ah. then why are you wering thisuniform ? "
" oh cos i feel like wearin new one. "
" ya , this one mostly is the lower sec wear one right ? "
" yupp. "
" girl you got boyfriend or not ? "
" ha ha no ^^ "
" why ??? you want me introduce you or noit ? "
" ha ha. "
" want ? why u no boyfriend ? i got 1 boy working here, around your age also. very handsome. you want or not ? "
" ha ha. heh heh. :o) "
" - shouts towards the kitchen but no one waz there. - he very handsome one, but now not here, i intro u him u eant ? "
" hhhmm hhm :o) "


i say " ha ha. " when i have nothin to say. but well and anyway, mr inverted MW was eatin over @ KF as well. i showed KK he waz the one and she said he looked a little kiddy. ha ha ! which i think is pritty true when he's out but when he's in skool then i think he looks pretty rad. oh no no, he looks just nice. ha ha ! he ain't gd lookin but thats whot i like about him :o) ha ! ha ! pardon me pls. im speakin like as tho he likes me :oP

but anyway !!! ja neh neh told me little 12 lotus was a great show so KK and i went to watch it. personally, i dont like the film. KK and i were just xhanging looks and chatting about other stuff. i feel this show is just, i dont know, it's just not my cup of tea i guess. last time when we ran out of movies to watch, i suggested the lian hua ( 12 lotus in mandarin. ) but she told me it waznt nice so we ended up watchin i for got what show, i have to refer to the old posts but then yesterday, after hearin janene's brief summary, i thot it sounded cool so i told KK. people said it waz a nice movie but aaah ! i really dont enjoy it. at all. probly becos we missed the first part again thats why we dont get a shit. we're always l8 for movies. but anyway ! we went sittin at the sofas. since we were l8 and i was lazy to find our seats, i pulled KK towards the sofa and so we ended up sittin there half watchin and half chattin.

well anyway ! i really wanna watch this hsow. something like, " everybody loves mandy. " the title. whoa fuck ! this is the kinda show i dig ! it is like all the guys love this girl called mandy and when i say all, i MEAN ALL. until there's this guy who's crazy over her he starts killin all the guy that she's with. it's like prom night. i think lah, i only saw the trailer once. the parts that made me really wanna watch is when they were in this open field, 1 guy was like huggin mandy, tellin her it waz all gonna be fine when bang bang bang ! he got shot by mr maniac. damn shiok right these kind ! and the other one is the i forgot what title. somthin' like these 2 people got controlled by donno what lah. i go find out the title then i tellu.

well, it is 23.40 but i can sleep l8 cos tomolo is wednesday yo ! ha ha, i was on blogger the whole evenin but i waz doin other stuff so here i am now typing. anyway ! my pictures for the 2 posts are gonza be up up upz !!! my blog looks odd without my faces. HA ! HA ! HA ! holy shit im just kiddin ! but it does feel sad there's no pictures. it feels empty and it just doesn't show me what kinda days i had. how am i ever gonna know what kinda pictures i took when im old ??? how wuld my children know how i looked like ??? huh ? ok. bye.

T HE HE.

ZANG LISA'S
FIRST ATTEMPT @
BEIN' THE SUPA MOM
ACCOMPLISHED
AND
PASSED FABULOSLY !!!


ha ha, i went grocery shoppin on my own today over at WM. well it's not entirely ' grocery shoppin. ' , it's more of gettin out of the hostel at night to get ZL's most awaited 30 prataz. ha ! ha ! ha ! shuld i get a tat ???? i really seriouzlee need help. you see, i am 95 percent ready but the bad thing is, some jobs like, say flight attending, can't allow applicants with tattoos to join their forces and like what if one day i decide to join this ultra fab companay but it rejects me just cos of the tatto i got when i was young and naive ? i really don't know. but say, if the job requires smartie pants, then i can totally forget about the pants and go get the tat instead. this is tough. but i AM gettin' one. i can easily save the money if i set my mind to. i kno i wont regret in future, im just afraid i cant be acceoted into a force i wanna be in, like, like i mentioned, flight attending. grr all these lil thots that sums up to a big problem are wrecking my brain brr.


MY AMBITION IS TO BE A MOM ! :o)

my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)
my ambition is to be a mom :o)

What a bad impression.

hey ya ! zang lisa iz back from yet another crazy day ! KK and i both slept at 5am last night, tried makin sure the person who wakes up first will call the other person and ha ha ! i woke up even wayyyy before my alarm rang ! it waz rainin so bloody heavy this mornin i waz so cold i had to force myself outta bed, grabbed the big azz jacket and went back to bed. fell back asleep instantly. the second time i got up was cos i waz too cold too, and it waz 10.55am. my alarm waz due in 5 minits time. but even tho i woke up hell early, i waz l8 all the same. it's all becos of the bloody faux lashes i waz puttin on ! i swear it wasted 50 minits of my life !!!! not to mention the bloody new lousy shit bra strap. im darn sure it took 20 minits of my time but fast forward, i met KK over at clementi's tube station. she waz waitin for me with her myanmar friends. but anyway, we didn't feel like goin to orchard so we went VivoC instead.

ha ha ! today waz pretty tight. KK bought a new everlast shoe. ha ha ! everlast is ahem. i have yet to tell anyone lor. okay maybe one. but anyway ! we tried on so many clothes today but nothing suited me !!! i guess when there really is no money, no matter how pretty the clothes look on u, ull just feel they're weird or doesnt suit you or too big or too small or too average or just a whole pile of excuses to cheer urself up cos u cant buy them.

but anyway, we caught FATE !! ha ha ha ! we bin wantin to watch this for quite some time but the thang is, it's only airing in golden village so. the movie's pretty good. this show has a fab and sad twist to ordinary heroic ending. 1 thumb up but the movie stretched out pretty long. it started at 18.40 and usually a movie wuld end 2 hours later, for most right ? but who on earth wud kno it ended at 21. 25 ??? KK and i certainly did not have a good time crying. we kept receiving really pestering calls and messages. please if you're close to me, you wuld know bloody damn well that i h8 to answer calls when i am doing something so if i dont fucking answer your calls for twice, you please get the hint fucking ok ? and i am not someone who asks the people what time the fucking movie ends. bloody pissed i tell you. what a. anyway ! after the movie, KK and i took a cab over to suntec to meet Jaw and the burmese friends. we all planned to watch the fireworks but by the time we reached, it all ended !!! and ha ha ha ! the taxi cab scene was especially funny. the taxi line was long like fuck so we called online and then just after i hung up the phone, ta ding ding ! the taxi was right in front of us, causing many envious stares from the taxi line opposite the street. ha ha ! met all of them at mac's, wanted to go touch the what lucky fountain but it waz closed so we just walked around and split wayz. KK sent me home cos she didn't want me to be l8 for RC. the fucking taxi driver is damn annoying i tell you. never mnd, well anwyay ! greedy pigs today ate 3 pieces of chicken, 1 fish mc spicy, 2 cheese fries, 2 normal fries and 2 pepsis from kentucky's. ha ha ha ! big appetites yes !!!!!? pictures aren't a lot, we didn't have the time to sit back and relax today. all was rushing. but i have a few of pictures while eating. and a few of me in the washroom and thats that. well i am gonna be persevering for yet another week so i can go out next weekends !! whoopie whoop !

peace ! ok, my lashes kept comin out cos half way glue-ing, i'll be up takin ictures. look at the tip of the eyes. stupid lashes. ANW, i waz curlin my hair lat minit. thus, the hair thingo.

cheese fries lickin' good !






cheerful dress.

gyal.

lise and her full of wonders ( wonderful. ) brotha !
KK and her myanmar friend, kai ting !
FG is cos i donno wot's his name, but KK and i talk about him, referin to him as the funny guy. and KT's cousin.it says : how d'ya do ?
we were over @ suntec's mac's. talkin. the person helpin us take the pigs is jaw's singer lookalike friend, benedict xcept he's too shy wit the cam :oP