The Writer.

The Writer.

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My latest obsession yo.

My latest obsession yo.
Sky Diving !!!!

Monday, November 2, 2009

VENICE VENICE WHERE ART THOU !!!!?????????


AAARGHZ -.-

so much 4 committin my 75 minits all solely on Venice -.-


i got back at 11 from KK's last night. by the time i finished bathing, it was alr 12.15. read venice allll e way till 1.15 in e mornin b4 goin 2 bed.

while on e way 2 school, i was memorizing venice notes like a love letter till i almost missed e sch bus stop by a few milli-secs until this kind gentleman cleared his throat, forcin me 2 tear my gaze away frm lovely venice -.-

fug sia. no venice. i only studied dear old venice lor. o well. aft venice, went back home n slept all e way till 1.15pm. my second paper starts at 14 but it was chem so none of my biz. bathed till 13.30 b4 leavin e house.

ive been feelin groggy these few days. it's like im alive n movin but my brain is frozen. it cant think n it feels ugly. like i cant function well . . it's like eveyr morning i wake up without a purpoze. it's just like a routine n i h8 it. so i decided 2 hav an adrenalin rush of rushin. i think my brain misses being l8 or somethin. so i slowly walked 2 e bus stop.

time check : 13.45
just nice.

waited 4 bus but i started gettin worried cos no friggin bus was available on sight !!! so took a cab n i was willing e driver 2 drive s slowly s he culd but fat chance. he zoomed all e way 2 sch in 5 minits tops -.-
which is equivalent 2 ? no adrenalin rush -.-


o well. tmr got history. no point studyin since my SS is so kiss-goodbye -.- but o well. better than nothin eh ?
bye bye !!
o and rain ??? thank you. i meant 2 wash both my sch shoe n bag soon but since u showered on me merciless, i guess i can 4ged abt it ^^

1 bad thing abt rainy days ????

fuckin earthworms arise 2 roam the earth. dizguztingz !!! ew. i dont even feel like eatin mac alr. i donno y i keep eating em -.- fat 2 death but also satisfyin so ugh. bye.


COWDOWNS ~!!!!!!

AFTER Os !

8 TINY DAYS !!!

X'MAS ^^ !!!!
er. my calender's not w me naw -.-
hmm probly 1 month ????

19th !!!
again my calender aint w me. errr. roughly 2 months n a few odd weeks ???

movin in 2 KK's !!!
hmm, 9 DAYS ????
v(^____^)v

pointless. my calender not here so not accur8. next tme. BY BYE !!



tryin a new function in an editing programme i just downloaded.

xi huan mah ??KK.

i love committing suicide in pictures. ha ha ha ! look @ tt molie girl.


eat n eat n eat ~

her banana crumble.

suzzette's birthday. ha ha, sry i love e name suzzette. she's susie BTW. 17.
NICE !!! makes me real happy xmas is near ^^^^^^

N CHECK DIS OUT YO !!!!!!


HA HA HA !!! ^^^^^^

thats is megan lookin seductively there :oD

Sunday, November 1, 2009

HEHEHE ~

GOooOoD MORNEEENG ~!! just got off e bed realizin I haven't posted sumthin v v v v important !!!! there's this green adidas jacket guy in this is it thatz reeeeallly cute !!! ha ha ha ha he looks like this chinese guy called ou-di tt I like :oP Mr Grin's ( he's always seen laughin n grinnin away ^^ ) first appearance is when he was wearin this green grafick tee w block lettering. he has a unik hairstyle so u can spot him EZily. e rest of e time he's bein a fashionista or he's wearin his trademark green jacket MOTT. his dressins always cool n different too . . . :o) k next I ave got many countdowns 2 do. but I'll post em up l8r cos I dunno haw 2 paragraph n change font size frm phones :o\ so by bye !
KK w curly hair up there.

anywayz im sleepin over w her now ^^
ha ha, today was a tirin day . . we went over 2 tempine's ikea 2 buy her furniture which w all might myint's might, culdnt lift tt bloody table -.-
yes. im surprised. im flabbergusted. -.-
anywayz ! watched this is it by mike jackson. isnt it tru wot they say u aint kno wot u got till it's gone ??? im gettin sleepy . . . anywayz. im bloody full now. just celebrated KK's friend, Susie's birthday. havnt eaten a birthday cake 4 a looooong time n now . . ive eaten it 2 much :oP
i think im gna fail my O's. i havent even started revising 4 e next few papers :oP i only kno there's SS n history which i need 2 do well. e rest ive given up. study hard, lisa ! buck up pull ur sock pull ur hair blah blah blah. ai ya. i gna go now. BB.

Friday, October 30, 2009


o manz !!! cant i just hav a tiny miny inch of megan fox pretti pls ?????? (o*__*o)
she's bloody sxc aaarghz.

im damn sure ppl watch jennifer's body just 2 gorge @ her lor.
ha ha ha ha ha.
e guys in e theatre were oooohin n aaaaahin @ her smexy scenes lol. i wuldnt b surprized if i had 2 waddle my way outta e theatre in e pool of saliva. he he.

anyway. the show's ok, nothin grand about e story line but 4 those who need a role model 2 work 2wards 2,
this show shuld b watched. no need 2 r8 e movie. just look at megan. n wish. n wish , n wish still . . .
ha ha ha.

anywayz ! my sleepin pattern's been goin haywire againz. i've been sleepin @ 4 in e mornin cos i'll b BZ playin snakes on mi fone !!
aaaghz.
havent played 4 quite awhile n im still stuck at lvl 22, e stupid circuit lvl -.-
bloody snake just refuse 2 stop banging on e wall n the stupid timer keeps explodin on me -.-
tho im proud 2 b the numero uno on e high score list. ha ha ha. isnt it funny. im competing w myself -.-
but to those who play Nokia Snakes thats's developed by IOMO studio, my highest score is 580,945 leh !!!!
ha ha ha ha, n this high score was ahieved only since 2 measly nights ago ok. ^__^

speakin of games, ive been dyin 2 play SIMS. i read jas's games megazine n just by lookin at ah. HAIZZZZZZ.


anyway. ive been thinkin. i think m gna get a gamin laptop next. i wanted 1 w good memory space, sound system n wide screen last time cos i'd be up bloggin more than half e day but now its different.
i dont blog s often s i used 2.
im goin 2 be up playin games instead.
ive quit playin RC in facebk cos this comp is 2 laggy. guardian said he got this desktop thats not too quick in motion to capture games or wotsoev e right technical term it is. point is, he siad he didnt wna get a 2 fab comp 4 gamin cos then jas'd b up all night n day gamin away . .

anyway. ive been survivin in e 5th world country recently. everything is dyin on mi.
my fone's spoilt 2 e xtend of neglectance.
my camera's battery is acting crazy.
KK's MP4 cant function properly ( she's loaned it 2 me since last yr.) overall, i need a technical replenish. errr. whatev tt means -.-
but sounds quite cool i must admit.

HA HA HA HA !!
TECHNICAL REPLENISHO ~!

ok.
i need a new fone. but i dont kno which. 2 many ppl r usin ifone n the E-Nseries fones. i want a sidekick but i need to go all the way to america 2 get it -.-
which is rather impossible -.-
then there's this fone that came out like when i was in p5-6 ?? the business-style fone by nokia. the goldie slide. slim slim one. also metallic. cold cold one.
back then it was 1k plus but now i dnno how much it costs.
but the flipside is :
i dont think it has a gd camera n sound quality. arghz. i dont kno how 2 choose. KK said e latest N97 mini is pretty cool. it's sort of like e sidekick i want but i feel the " push factor " is 2 hardcore. like a fake fone like that. the sliding-pushing thingamajig isnt v smooth like how i want mine 2 be . . .
i know i kno.
my technical terms are so profound u need 2 consult ur
" Crazy-Dumb-Tweet Teachician Dicktionary. "
-.-

sign. . . . if only i knew Mr Nokia. he'd design a fone 4 me . . now how cool wuld that be hmm ?
*__*
wishful thinkings aside, yipee yoop yoop !!!

O's ending soon ~!!!!!!!
weeeeeeeee ~~~~~

dear Jesus, thank you.
my mother is well now :o)
her health check-ups including a brain scan prove positive. she's well now even her voice sounded chirpy ^_^
she's so well now tt in fact, she was climbing a moutain last night when she called me -.-
HA HA HA HA.




i think my mom is like me when she was younger. doesnt bother 2 do anything including talkin when we're sick but once we're well,
zoooooooooom ~! we can b so xtreme -.-

oki. im happy cos she's happy. my family's like so dispersed. like the pollen n flower thingamajig. o !! i remember jason readin 2 me his science notes.
" flaura and fauna. "

ha ha ha, watev tt means.
sounds flowerish. so.

mom bringin granny 2 tai wan 4 a hol.
jaw bro in myanmar preparin 4 his future.
jas fag in thailand mustering e courage 2 ask ploy out 4 a movie.
me in singapore smilin at herself foolishly thinkin abt her family. arghz.

ok. i wnat go alr lah. e longer i stay, e more rubbish i tend 2 spurt out zzzz.

PS,
jaw, if u r readin my blog, KK asks u 2 add her up in facebook !!!
she can't seem 2 find ur profile.
donno why. but u r in my friend list. but e amazing thing is, u r like invisible 2 her. donno why :-O
anyway. she said 2 tell u ur pictures r nice :o)
n she misses hanging out tgt like e last time when we all went 2 penin 2 eat n e " draw tattoo " day ^^
hope 2 c u soon ~!!!

anyway. ive been reminded of u these few days. i might not even have noticed it until KK told me.
all along i was blinded 2 e brotherly-love u shower me w.
i thot it was just an action that doenst mean much . .
but now i think of it n i regret not cherishing e moments.

i remember u were always there 2 call me n ask me how ive been doin when we were seperated.
there u were in newton n here i was in toh yi. but u never failed 2 turn up everyday at 6.30pm 2 have dinner w me.
back then i was reluctant to go out but if time could rewine n give me another chance, i promose i wuld never have done something like that again. you were always there bringing chips and snacks for me everytime u met me. u even gave me money when u were tight w it urself.
thank you, gor. for being there endlessly without me knowing.
love u !!!! hope every thing will go well 4 u.

u may not kno it but mom loves u just e same as she loves me n jas.
in fact i think she dotes on u except u arent aware of it.
e last time i was in thailand w her,
she called u n scolded u without knowin e truth abt ur tuiton fee ?
ya, u didnt spend e tuition fee but she thot u spent it so she was angry . . . . . but she did e mistake of not askin u first if u did.

so u 2 quarelled over it over e fone.
i was there bside her all along.
after u 2 hung up, her face was filled w so much pain i had 2 go 2 e toilet or else she'd kno ive been crying.
but e thing u didnt c was, she was havin this xpression i ave never seen her have b4 in my life.
she then stuttered. " ha .. . ha. ge ge mei you na na ge qian. "
i culd only mutter an " Orh. "
cos what else culd i say . .. i didnt kno where 2 think.

she then called u back n passed me e fone,
askin me 2 ask u if u wanted anythin from thailand cos u were there all alone in myanmar. but e thing is, u didnt know mom was so regretful of her outburst she thot she culd aplogize by buying u things that u liked so you n her could end e cold war n wished that bad confrontation had nvr occured . . . but u were furious w her 4 not findin out e truth first. so u didnt want anything that's from her. u shouted those hurtful words about her so i had 2 once again, leave her room and walk out 2 e balcony tryin 2 shift my attention on e sky outside. e thing u didnt kno was, while i was still in her room talkin 2 u, she was looking at my expressions so intently, as tho she wants 2 make out what you were sayin.


when i came back 2 her, she looked up at me hopefully, w an uncertain smile on her face, asking me " na me. . ge ge yao shen me mah ? "
i culd only say " orh, ta shuo bu yao shen me le. "
she then asked " ta you jiang shen me mah ? mama yi wei shi ta na na ge qian qu yong . . qi shi ta mei you na. "
i said " orh. zhen de ah. ta mei jiang shen me. ta zhi shuo ta dong xi dou gou le. "

if she knew u were still mad at her, im sure she wuldnt even b able 2 go 2 bed, let alone face herself in e mirror before she goes 2 bed.

everytime she's mad at u, im certain she's aching at the back of her, cryin and blamin herself for havin 2 scold u but all she wants is for u 2 go on e right path. all she wants is not 4 us 2 end up like dad.
n thats why she has 2 be strict when it comes 2 bad habits like smoking and drinking. she'd just collapse when she sees you, jason and i turn into crazy alcoholics n 24\7-drunkards.

she doesnt want me to be too pressurized in my work but i cant help feeling so lost and hopeless. it's like theres a part of me thats insufficient 2 reciprocate her love for us. i know ive been sayin i love her n i love her but i dont believe i LOVE her without some " proof. "

so here i am, wanting u 2 know that mother loves us.
it's just that e way she loves us is different from others.
she doesn't say " i love u my sweet children ! "
or kiss us on e foreheads 2 show her love.
the love she showers on us abundantly is hidden. it's like . .. it's like secret messages that have to be decoded by no one but ourselves.
if not, we're just gonna go on thinkin she's never loved us like how we hope she had.

i agree she's moody at times n she gets irritated by us at a single touch but those are her moments of anxiety when her business are goin downspiral. i myself also feel dejected eveytime shes like that but i told myself she's worried sick for one reason n one reason only.

she culdave just stopped all these mundane chores of guarding over her lands and let dad take em over but if she did,
we won't be where we are now . . gettin what we want easily with a snap of our fingers. she's doing all these extra worryings, adding wrinkles and age that does so much 2 her face just for US. she doesnt want us to be abandoned by people that are always waiting for her to fail and collapse . . she doesnt want us to be alone when none of our kins are left in this world . . . when we are old and she is gone . . if she stopped workin, we won't get e cahnce to study abroad. we'd end up like ah-san-jiu, leadin life aimlessly. without any respect from people.

the thing is, she wants us to succeed and be looked up and admired by dad's people. esp his loser-family. even when dad is acting like a complete bastard, she doesnt want us to stop loving him because she doesnt want us to lack e father-figure in our lives. she doesnt want us to feel we are fatherless. she's even asked us to support him when he's old and penniless. which try as i might, will never be done sincerely becos i will never 4give u win han n that mother-fucking whore and their bunch of cunt-faced children that's robbed us off of our family-ties.

when i first told her about my prom night this year, the first thing that escaped her mouth was,
" hhhhhhheegh ( e sign mama always uses :o) ) kan mah. ru guo gorgor hai zai singapore du shu ne hua, ta ye shi kor yi ke chang jia ne ah... "

anyway. i guess this is all for my emotional rantings.
i hope you are well and dont forget to be reminded that behind all the beautiful sceneries, there's a little butterfly thats always hovering above at the distant,
guarding over the flowers, the grasses and you.
the butterfly is us, gor.
we love you.
ok, that might be an odd example but still . . . :o)
i hope u r well. please update your journal becos i always read ur entries :o) i never fail to. :o)

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

taken off frm bro's facebk.

HI.

dang. itz becumin a habbit 2 surf e internet (-.-)''

m gna jot down my feelin 4 math 2day.

IT SUCKKED.

not e paper.

paper wuz pretti EZ but i just dint how 2 do em -.-
i donnno haw 2 solve :o(

im wierd. i slept at 4am on sun doin math papers but e day right b4 math ? i became a goodie 2 shoe n slept @ 12am. got up @ 11am but i wuz still feelin groggy so i went 2 bed n thot of stuff till 1pm b4 gettin ready 4 schl. ive been feelin really down aft mom's call last night.

it's left me w an emotion so raw i cunt ged over it. here i m wastin my time, my youth n my mom's $$$. there she is worryin over us, wastin her youth, earnin $$$. instead of makin use of my time in SG 2 gain some knowledge, i m here playin my days away.

she asked me how my english paper was. i told her it was tough. she then told me this without a minit of hesitation or a second of a chance 2 xplain myself on why i thot it wuz tough. she simply said :


" It is ok, Joyce. You don't have to worry about it too much, ok ? As long as you have tried to do it, it is all right. Don't assert too much pressure on yourself. Mommy doesn't care if you get high marks, don't be too pressurized. "

it always pains me 2 tok 2 her cos im filled w so much remorse.


dearest mommy, i love u w all my life n if anythin happens 2 u, anythin at all, i swear w my life i will be ur pride and never fail. it always leaves me in tears knowing you arent feeling well. i can handle e truth, pls mom, just take care of ur health. ur health is more important 2 me than anything in e world. i love you with all my heart, my soul, my fibre n my life. i love you.
so pls. forgive me 4 e wrong i ave done. i love you sooo much !!! :รณ(


anywayz. im gna go i guess. no use wastin my time on e net. so by.

loveddddddddd

Life is beautiful ~!!!!!!

Life is beautiful ~!!!!!!

a lil' somethin'.

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