self entry.

so recently i've been talking to this guy and IDK what/why/how but i just enjoy talkin' to him tho we don't talk much about anything in parti. it's been ages since i messaged anyone and now that i am, it's pretty nice to wake up to messages and going to bed with one. well it was nice while it lasted.

cos it's freaking confirmed. my attraction to a guy never go pass 1 week. which is really sad. cos things usually soar up after a week, like when you both discover the amazing and beautiful fact that there is a smooth chemistry that keeps the conversation well oiled and running.

 but the thing about me is once i smell the slightest scent of chemistry, i completely shut myself out. like i get so dead terrified of what might come after that.

 the " face a storm first and you get a rainbow. " shit doesn't apply to me. im the complete opposite. i see the rainbow rising gloriously but i'm so blinded by its brilliance and what it will bring to my life that i start focusing on all the negativities like what i will lose if the rainbow just disappear outta the blue one day and take away every little bit of brilliance it brought along.

call me the pessimist of love but i would rather have the freedom and happiness with a guy than be tied down to just him and be wary of every little thing he say/do. long grandmother father auntie uncle great grandparents story short, i would rather be friends than anything else. cos ??? friendships are my boat and relationships are my.................. fuck. what's a poetic way to end it bimbo nadhirah ???

well. and relationships are like my landlords. i don't like it.


teeeehhheeeeeeeeeeee.

i was shitting and typing the first chunk just now LOL. information overload ~~!!!


anyhoo. story is unfinished.

so i was saying i've been talking to this guy and i made some " improvements. " that i don't do so easily. and that is, i fucking answered a phone call HA HA HA.

 if u know me well, i am the queen of not answering your calls. unless im bored or im having a good mood, or if it's v v v v v v v v v important ( aka family and friends asking to club. ) then i will. other than that, no thank u !!! just drop me a text and i will get back to you within 5seconds ( NOT even kidding -..- )

 so anyhoooo. the first time he called me, i fell asleep. ha ha ha, the stupid mistake i made ????

 not switching my phone to silent mode.

 i always do before i go to bed but that night, i fell alseep with no intentions to kekekek. answered and he was like sorry blah blah, don't forget to cover yourself with the blanket ( aww. but shygirl91. i was just sure sure sure. okok. ok. bye. LOL. see how unaccustomed i am to talkin on the phone -..- ) so we texted and shit and talked on the phone a few nights ago. think saturday. ya, saturday cos i was supposed to go club but didnt cos i was that bloody hungover.

and i was like aaaah fuck it. just answer the shit and get it over n done with. i gave an awkward hello ? and he was using this funny little voice and saying sawadeee krab !! so i instantly relaxed and we just pretty much talked and talked and talked.

didn't discuss the politics or the end of the world. more of his life. i dislike ( read : hate. ) talking about myself unless im high on alcohol ahem. i love listening so i listened and laughed. he's got a really subtle sense of humor that's really funny. like the responses he makes ha ha ha. by the end of the phone call, i did not have the other kind of emotions for him. more like a friends' material. so we hung up until i saw the call register stated i been on the phone for a bloody 52 minutes -..-

 had the shock of my life. i never talk that long on phones. there was only once. eh no, twice. once with aloysius in sec sch ( i was silent all out. ) second was with sean a few months ago and thats cos we were bored. and now, a bloody fuck. with a stranger.

ha ha ha, i told KK and she was like, " wait wait !!! was it through viber or the normal call services cos it makes a BIG difference ???? " and i LOLed and told her he called me via the normal call services LOL.

anyhoo. thing is, i'm too lazy to type nicely. cos this is for myself to read back at the memories teeeheeeeeeeee. hi to whoever's still reading to this pointless point i salute you. nah, here's a BIG flying kiss for ya !!!!!! got garlic breath tho hehehehehehehehehehe.

anyhoo. where was i. aaaaah yes. he's in some out field thing now and now i know why it's so difficult to date an army boy. they're forever unreachable and that's when your feelings start to fade. which is exactly what mine did. 1 week. yay, i am not surprised ha ha ha.

tired of typing. will go UPD8 the old entries lest nad the crazy bitch come scold me hehehehe ciao ciao !!!