well hello ! it's the almost a spanking new year (12days late), la 2015, year of the goat aka year of me.. and mini me 😁
before I met joe, I treated new year like everyone else. new year, new start, new me. I set down resolutions and goals and new hopes (albeit never once crossing them off my list.) and felt the new year adrenalin at full force until the clock strikes 12 and it becomes 02/01/XXXX and all of my old habits start rolling in one by one and I lose the motivation for the new year 😂
but now, i don't feel the new year vibe anymore. ha ha ha, these days all I feel/ my mantra is : as long as joe's with me. I guess this is where through thick and thin comes from. I don't mind walking on spikes and coals.. as long as joe's with me. wait no, I don't even want him to walk on those. I want to walk for him. cheesy much but that's what love makes you do 😝
anyway. I'm currently in my third trimester aka the last lap. I didn't feel anything before but these days, I'm starting to doubt if I can bring my baby out into this world. if I have enough energy in me to push her out. I'm so scared these days I'm starting to consider c-section 😱
trust me to be so fearless 😖
after a huge roundabout as to where I'm gonna give birth, we have finally settled with bangkok (again.) however, joe and I are facing some financial restrictions now which is making me less assured of our decision. but on the other hand, the hospitals and the services here in yangon is a major 😖😖😖😖
that's it for tonight. it's 0205am in the morning and I have the worst sleeping pattern ever. and eating pattern/choices. like joe says, it will be ok in the past but I'm a mother now. I have to do what's best for my baby but try as I might, I'm always doing things the unpregnant way😖
need to pee. so ciao now ! will keep this space alive 😄
current me 🚼
week count : 32week 5days
weight count : 77KG /170pounds
others : restless, backache
