abcd

i know it's time i admit i have to let go but here i am holding on so tight hoping, no matter how slight, for it to turn out the way the movies do. always ending happily.

but who the fuck am i kidding. we don't have any shared interests, i want it but i dont wanna work for it.

i honestly don't understand myself sometimes. im only interested when the other loses interest. and when they are still wrapped in the interest, i get so sick of their attention i just throw them away. and when they are gone finally, i start seeing their good and start wishing things would go back the way they were.

ugh. now that im so near him, im literally losing interest. how i hope things would go back to the way it was when we were miles apart.

simple and sweet.

now it's just angry and boring.